Perspective

After spending seven hours in the library working on a presentation on wrongful convictions due to child suggestibility, I walked home through the leaves at sunset. Such a beautiful time of day! I reflected on where I am: nearly half way through my law degree, with a husband who likes his job and loves the city, sisters I am close to very nearby and a future ahead in a challneging career.

It has been a rough ride to get here, nothing in my life has been very easy (except, honesly, my marriage--so far!) but I am here. I like where I am and I'm excited about what lies ahead. It really is great to take these moments to reflect.

Mean Girls

When I was 15, I had an experience with a mean girl. We were in a situation where we were together all day, every day for one solid year. For whatever reason, this popular, pretty girl decided early on that I was her nemesis and made my life damn miserable.
Flash forward to last night when I had a dream about this girl--now woman and mother of three--leaving her baby with me and screaming that I couldn't be trusted. I woke up thinking about this negative relationship in my life and, out of interest, logged into her facebook page to learn...she had "unfriended" me.
What's all this to mean? That I'm a little bit psychic? That childhood relationships carry over into adulthood? That just because you haven't seen someone in seventeen years doesn't mean they don't hate you? I have no idea. A part of me is pleased that I can still connect so well to the emotions of my past and a part of me is angry that this person still has power over me.
But mostly I'm just grateful--grateful that I am NOT that lonely, introverted fifteen year old, thrilled that many people cannot even imagine me as introverted and grateful that most of my interactions with others have resulted in friendship and not alienation.

No Wonder I Liked Sarah Palin's Outfits So Much

From Politico:
The Republican National Committee appears to have spent more than $150,000 to clothe and accessorize vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin and her family since her surprise pick by John McCain in late August.

According to financial disclosure records, the accessorizing began in early September and included bills from Saks Fifth Avenue in St. Louis and New York for a combined $49,425.74.

The records also document a couple of big-time shopping trips to Neiman Marcus in Minneapolis, including one $75,062.63 spree in early September.

The RNC also spent $4,716.49 on hair and makeup through September after reporting no such costs in August.

Politico asked the McCain campaign for comment, explicitly noting the $150,000 in expenses for department store shopping and makeup consultation that were incurred immediately after Palin’s announcement. Pre-September reports do not include similar costs.

Spokeswoman Maria Comella declined to answer specific questions about the expenditures, including whether it was necessary to spend that much and whether it amounted to one early investment in Palin or if shopping for the vice presidential nominee was ongoing.

“The campaign does not comment on strategic decisions regarding how financial resources available to the campaign are spent," she said.

I Heart My Laptop

While reading a post about how my personal hero, Rachel Maddow, confesses to practically living her life online, I had to wonder: exactly how much time do I spend online/on my computer? Let's see: I'm usually on at 7 or 8 getting the news and checking my favorite blogs, then I carry my computer to class and use it to type notes. I also use my computer to do legal research and store said research in my Word program. If I'm eating lunch alone, I will surf the Internet while I enjoy my meal. I also check my email multiple times a day and watch TV/movies and documentaries on ninjavideo.net at night.

All in all, I am on my laptop 14-15 hours a day. Wow! How do you define an addict again?

Dancing Queen

One of the great things about moving up to Vancouver is that I am connecting with my immediately family. I am a bit older than my sisters and haven't really been in their lives. So when I got to go shopping with my sister Becca for her ball (!!) gown, it was so much fun. She tried on lots of dresses and we found these great accessories. It was so wonderful to be there with her for that.

Doggone it, You Betcha!

As someone who lived in Russia and yet still feels she has no substantive foreign policy expertise, I LOL'd at this video. I have a sneaky suspicion it wasn't made in Russia, though. I must ask the opinion of my fellow Russia-traveler. Whadda ya think, Clare?

Slimeball

It's interesting when someone invokes another's "agenda": the black "agenda," the liberal "agenda," the gay "agenda" and the feminist "agenda." Why is it that white men's interests are not protrayed as an agenda? Their hopes, aspirations and desires are viewed as too diverse to measure with such a word. After all, they are people and people don't all want the same thing. But step outside of the patriarchy and everyone else carries nepherous agendas through life.

In thinking about this further, it someone asked me to define what feminist want from society (sort of like an agenda, but without lumping us all together in our aspirations) the only real connection I would venture to make about all of us is this: we want to exist as full people. We want to be people the way a white man is a person: allowed inner complexity, a human being first and not primarily a sex object (or non-sex object). We want our ideas to be heard and not immediately dismissed for our "womanness."

I agree with McCain on one thing: Sarah Palin is no feminist. Now, we can we all stop pretending she is?

We're Here!

Last night, we went to meet friends in a district of downtown Vancouver called "Yaletown." For Monster and I, this is where we'd like to set up house when we first move off campus. We've been scouting areas for our first place and Yaletown has a lot of what we want: enough to shopping, restaurants, coffee shops and a nightlight just blocks away. I hope I'll be working downtown or close to downtown that I can walk to work in the morning. At night, we want to look out the windows of our highrise condo and see all the lights of the city shining back at us--reflected off the water. Walking around Yaletown last night, I was just gleefull with how much I love this city.

And it occurred to me this morning that perhaps one of the reasons I love thinking about our life here is that I've never had roots. From the time I was a young teen, moving around from place to place has been the standard. Even when I got married, there was law school in the future. Since I didn't want to attend the local Tampa law school, it meant a big move was always in store for us. It turns out, that move was to Vancouver. But I don't foresee a move away from here. We love the atmosphere of this city, how safe we feel walking down the streets at night, the plentify public transportion, the emphasis on physical fitness, the snow capped mountains. We see ourselves here for a long time.

And that is so exciting to me, that I have found a place to just be. To set down roots and be a part of the community. Last night, ten of us crowded around a large oak table in this fabulous Phantom of the Opera-style restaurant and it was just perfect, inviting and warm. We've found friends and careers and our future here in Vancouver. It is home.

Night Off

Tonight was special--the first night all week I haven't been home after 9. And it feels so good. Yes, I had to study and finish assignments this evening but I also made a delicious curry dinner (and two kinds of curry: prawn for me and chicken for Monster). Right now I'm watching The Office and not thinking about school. I had to play hooky to get this evening of bliss but it is worth it.

On a Day of Disappointments

Have you been half asleep
and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors?
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the lovers, the dreamers and me

Typical Day (Or, How I Got so Pale and Wane)

I am majorly procrastinating today, so let me continue to update my blog with a small sampling of my schedule as a second year law student. Take Tuesday, for example...

Tuesday:

7 AM: alarm goes off...whoever is up first makes coffee, followed by bagels and cream cheese (or, occasionally we'll get breakfast biscuits from the coffee shop twelve steps away from our door)
7:30 AM: turn on the news while eating: flip around BCC, CNN and CBC until I get a half-decent sense of what's going on in the world. Turn on computer and check blogs/news sites in order to further enhance this understanding.
8 AM: walk to school (easily one of the best parts of my day, especially in fall. Just.Gorgeous.)
8:15 AM: open the Feminist Legal Center in the Annex or sit in the interaction area in the middle of the school: check emails and repy.
8:30 AM: review agenda for daily responsibilities: start checking things off
9 AM: review notes from Corporations Law class, read textbook
11 AM: Corporations Law class
12:30 PM: lunch break: go to whichever meeting I am scheduled to attend
1:30 PM: cast around frantically for something to eat--decide do not have enough time to trek to the Student Union Building for lunch--check the Annex fridge to see if there is anything edible--decide to buy a piece of cheese from the small store we have inside the school. Drink coffee/water.
2 PM: review notes for Family Law class, read cases
3 PM: attend Family Law class, take notes
4:30 PM: head to coffee shop across campus for mediation advocacy moot practice with my partner
5 PM: review problem and create strategies for Thursday's mediation moot pracitce
7:30 PM: come home exhausted and hungry, thankful I have a sweet husband who makes all the meals. And brings me wine.
7:35 PM: start replying to all the emails that built up during the day, check my agenda for tomorrow.
8 PM: eat
8:30 PM: shower
9 PM: watch TV or a movie with my husband or talk with him
9:30 PM: start to feel very sleepy
10 PM: say goodnight to my husband, crawl in bed
---
So, that's it. And there really isn't even time for the amount of reading and researching I am supposed to be doing for my classes. I am just wingin' it from one moment to the next. I have recorded this schedule for posterity, so I or my doctor can look back on past dealings and realize where it all went sideways.

Because I Want to Be Inspired

As this two year election cycle winds down, I've been watching more old movies (and by "old", I mean the mid-nineties. That information alone is depressing.) I've gravitated towards inspirational speeches of fake presidents and will include one such speech below, from An American President with Michael Douglas. This little snippet reminds me of all the reasons democracy is so difficult to achieve and how easy it is to be petty and angry in the face of adversity.
Over Christmas break (read: when I have time), I would love to gather up all the old West Wing episodes and watch 'em all in a row. They inspire me to work hard at my job, to think big, to speak up.
Because living in the real world is so scary right now, I'm doing the new-fangled version of what people did during the Depression years of the 1930s': going to the movies...

Still Waiting for Pictures from "Run for the Cure"

...so here are pics from the AIDS walk I did a few weeks ago.

The Daily Squishy--Beginnings: Gabrielle Rae Montgomery-Kuhn

This is late on the draw, but my sister Maria gave birth to her first child a few weeks ago, a beautiful little girl. I will call her "Ella" as "Gabby" is not my first choice of a nickname. When she was born, we were too busy worrying about the complications my sister suffered after labor to really reflect on her arrival. But, my sister is fine, thanks to trained doctors and all those who give blood, and we can rejoice that we get to live in a world where both my sister and her beautiful daughter thrive and grow.

One of the reasons I am so late posting this is because second year law has taken hold of my life with a vengence. I determined I would be hyper involved this year and it has come with a price. While I try to figure out how to balance my study obligations with my external commitments, I am so grateful for my husband. He has worked twelve hour days, done all the laundry, the shopping, the home care and still finds time to spoil me with extravagent surprises, like the 3rd generation iPhone that is now, inexplicably, mine. I love you, Baby. You take care of me so well.

I would blog about the townhall-style debate we just watched (and how I waived my fists around and cheered when Obama finally BROUGHT it) but this is a post fundamentally about third generation members, and my little niece is the star of the show.

I will say this, though, having a niece has brought to my attention all the bad in the world that I wish I could fix before my niece grows up. She was born a few days into what my Corporations Law professor called the "world-wide economic melt-down"!!! And the economy crisis is just one of many fundamentally difficult issues we face. If I could choose the leaders of the world she will inherent, I would staff it full of people like Barack Obama. Men who don't fear intelligence and discourse, women who value diversity and don't make idols of hate and bigotry. I can't shape her world but I can be a vital part of it. I hope I can show her by example what it means to be an engaged citizen, to educate yourself on issues and be an advocate for others. She gives me something to look forward to: the future.

Sometimes the Universe Rights Itself

Thirteen years to the day after O.J. Simpson's acquittal for double homicide, he was found guilty on twelve counts of kidnapping and other charges in Nevada. With a tanking economy, an Election-That-Will-Not-Die, and celebrity reality shows, its nice to know that sometimes, what goes around comes around.

"I Love The Whole World"

I am so busy these days, way too busy. I haven't posted much but I will soon. Here is a video promo for the Discovery Channel. So cute and I love the Stephen Hawkins cameo. I don't want to belabour the point (notice the Canadian spelling?) but I have a niece now, and kind of look at the world differently. More pessimistically than usual. And maybe its just because its an election year and things seem so bleak, but I love the hope and simplicity this video clip details.