(*Same shit, different day)
I went to a mediation with one of the partners at the firm and our side kicked some ass. But after the mediation, one of our clients gestured towards me & told our group of six men (lawyers and clients) that he wanted to swear but wouldn't do so in front of me. I told him I was not made of sugar but he replied that he "wasn't raised that way."
Le sigh. Sexism disguised as nobility. SSDD.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
PASSED (and PAST) THE BAR!
So, I passed the Bar.
Yay, me! Wow, that was an intense six months. But, as much I as literally worried myself sick, I learned a lot of about myself too. Like, I have the capability to worry myself until I am literally sick, throw out my neck, can't breathe, wake up with insomnia.
I also learned that life owes me nothing, that I must fight to hold onto all my gains, that I am not a special little snowflake but someone with extraordinary privilege. And I have been very, very lucky in my life thus far.
Finally, when I finally got to the point where I had accepted both fates equally--passing and failing the Bar-- I won. I learned that I passed the Bar. I can stay at my firm (at least until my contract is up at the end of May). I can stay in this gorgeous city that I love, that has become a part of me and a part of Monster.
And my life is better than ever. I am so, so privileged: I was fitted for my gown this week (custom-made -- with french cuff shirts to my specifications!), I had two meetings with major clients and one full day of trial and I am leading evidence at trial on Monday.
The storm has passed. I learned what I needed to learn. Life is better than ever. And I am one lucky girl.
[Edited to add this video of Joni Mitchell's "Both Sides Now":
"I've looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all.
I've looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all."
Yay, me! Wow, that was an intense six months. But, as much I as literally worried myself sick, I learned a lot of about myself too. Like, I have the capability to worry myself until I am literally sick, throw out my neck, can't breathe, wake up with insomnia.
I also learned that life owes me nothing, that I must fight to hold onto all my gains, that I am not a special little snowflake but someone with extraordinary privilege. And I have been very, very lucky in my life thus far.
Finally, when I finally got to the point where I had accepted both fates equally--passing and failing the Bar-- I won. I learned that I passed the Bar. I can stay at my firm (at least until my contract is up at the end of May). I can stay in this gorgeous city that I love, that has become a part of me and a part of Monster.
And my life is better than ever. I am so, so privileged: I was fitted for my gown this week (custom-made -- with french cuff shirts to my specifications!), I had two meetings with major clients and one full day of trial and I am leading evidence at trial on Monday.
The storm has passed. I learned what I needed to learn. Life is better than ever. And I am one lucky girl.
[Edited to add this video of Joni Mitchell's "Both Sides Now":
"I've looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all.
I've looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all."
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