I have started to blog again because I'm starting to get scared that I haven't done anything these past few years. I finished law school and stopped regularly updating this blog. Since then, I feel like I've been floating through my daily life with no memories of anything. I feel like I've accomplished nothing these past few years. I have the dogs and I've managed to earn a paycheck for the majority of my post-school life, but I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere. If I keep a blog again, I will have to be more aware of what

New Post!

I ate my way through this weekend: eggs and toast, guacamole, buffalo chicken dip, oysters. We enjoyed the sunshine with the doggies and got a few things for the apartment - shoe racks and a duvet cover. I look forward to the weekends so much, these two days fly by. I am hoping for some stability at work for the next month until we go to Florida on vacation.

Blogging

I started this blog in 2006, when I was a newlywed studying for the LSAT. Through the move to Vancouver and three years of law school, I have kept up this blog. It is my record of that stressful, thrilling time. During articles & my struggles with the Bar, I started to update less and less, partially because I was so anxious and didn't want to record that anxiety over and over. But partially it's because practicing law requires discretion, and that makes blogging difficult. What if I say something about my work that doesn't respects my fiduciary duties to the firm?

So, that's probably it for my blogging, even as sporadic and it was. I will keep my blog up for awhile, until I can digitize it somewhere else. I'm glad I blogged as long as I did. It took me from my undergrad degree through law school and articling. Now, on to the next chapter of my life as a junior associate.

Associate

My sister asked me via facebook today if I thought the wait was worth it. I do. I a now the only associate in a three partner firm. And I am loving it - the work, but especially the people. I work long hours without complaint because I am part of a great team.

Tonight, we knocked off around 6 p.m. and had drinks together. This is a good bunch, and I hope my path stays along their's for a long time to come.

The Daily Squishy

Happy 3rd birthday, Squishy! I love you! You say cute, smart things and you keep things interesting. I am so excited to see you become the person you will become. You are very loved!

The Daily Squashy

!st birthday. Squashy is a little love, so calm & cute and solid. She is congenial like her mommy, and goes with the flow. I am looking forward to getting to know you, Squashy, as you grow bigger.

Living Day to Day

My friend CM posted this on her facebook page & it's been on my mind all day:

"It's kind of wonderful how hard times help us focus on the present. It's all we have, and I keep forgetting it's enough."

What lessons have hard time taught me? What do I know about life after nearly four decades on this planet? Why don't I have a better grasp on my purpose & the meaning of my life? I want to go far away & get my head on straight again.

Still Not There

I haven't been updating this blog because I've been hiding from myself. I am still working at the Union, still not really getting the training I need to become a litigator. I have interviewed more than a handful of times but never got the job. I am still looking, looking, looking...but at this point I am not really sure what I want.

How did I go so far off the rails so soon? Everyone else in my life is following their career path, doing the type of work they love. I might as well be folding sweaters at The Gap. And I found out recently that there might not be work for me at The Gap for a few weeks. The good thing about that is I'll have more time to connect with my network and find out who is hiring (I'm thinking family law, maybe I'll go into family law). The bad news is that, with two incomes, we bought a car and adopted two dogs. Our expenses have gone up and our income is about to go down if I'm not working.

Also, I found out that, after our last round of bargaining, my Union negotiated a very, very low pay scale for people in my position. This means that those whose job is to answer the phones, those who never have to stay late and get vacation time, they also get paid about $1000 a month more than me. There is no easy way to say how screwed over I am by my Union's choices. And I am a union representative! Irony, everywhere irony.

I joined a dodgeball team and tonight was our second game. The other team, Double Rainbow, OMG! creamed us. And there were such assholes about it. Who knew you could take dodgeball so seriously? Especially since everyone on the team sported a fake beard?

My life has been a huge suckball this past year, but I am still holding on. The same things that sustained me last year - my marriage, my relationship with my sisters, my friends, they are all still there. And now, I have two cute little doggies! Sometimes I get so disgusted and discouraged that I haven't found my firm yet but mostly I try not to think about it.